gender bending

vi

In the past week I took my first steps into the whole sl gender bending thing. Of course I already knew it is not an unusual thing in sl and I also bumped into enough female avi’s with obvious male typists but this recent experience really got to me. In general I can say that one gets to recognize the female/male avi’s pretty soon as they are usually dressed up poorly. Either as long legged, big breasted bimbo’s desperately seeking for girl girl sex or as pretty basic sl avi’s without prim hair. Any rl girl would not walk around in sl with her default hair when there is so much prim hair around to shop for. Believe me, I’m a girl. What’s so funny about the first category is that it totally lacks in ‘fashionista’. As long as the girl presents the basic ingredients it’s okay. As I said…legs and breasts (where in self made shapes the hips usually are forgotten)…and as for clothes short skirts and stiletto heels usually do the trick. Doesn’t matter if they match or not. Anyway, this first category is, generally speaking, as with their wardrobe, not very picky in their contacts. They want a girl and they want it quick. So they start their lame and purposeful chatting up …. which is where you definitely recognize them as a man, hadn’t you done that before. So, those being the basics I am now cracking my skull over something I never saw coming. I met this guy, months ago. A kind, intelligent, artistic, sane, funny, somewhat absentminded and cute guy. Alltogether an attractive person to me. We meet in rl. He’s still a guy, and all those other things as well. And I start liking him more. How that turned out to be the wrong thing to do. I already knew he had a female avi and it really didn’t bother me much. Why would it? Like I said, I already knew lots of men try it out so he was no exception. Months ago he already wanted to show her to me but I said ‘neh, let’s don’t‘ back then. How smart of me. Last week I was talking to him again and he noticed I was wearing prim lashes, and somehow in this conversation about lashes I ended up meeting her, his female avi. So there I was, standing face to face with a superherostyle bdsm mistress dressed in black latex. And not, as in the first category, put together in haste for some easy sex. No, this girl was attented to with the most detailed care. Which in fact did not surprise me at all since he has shown that same eye for detail in other things as well. Moreover, despite the fact that she had this whole hardcore sex thing going on, looking at the undeniably sweet face he has given her I don’t really think she is a one-issue-avi. Anyway, can you imagine all the questions this instantly raised for me? What did he do? Did he build his dreamwoman? Does he like this? Is he into rl bdsm? And in what role? These things can actually keep me up at night. He built his fantasy I thought, since that is what I see most men doing. This must be what he likes. Definitely sub. But then I wondered…if you prefer sub how could one play dom? Could one? How does it work? Is it something where one can easily shift between the different roles or is it a set thing…either this or that? Like being a man or a woman. I am a woman and it is not something I have to think about. I just am. For me having a female avi was not a question. Not at any moment. When I had to choose between a male or female avi I don’t think I seriously considered having a male one. And already after a few days in sl I realized that pretending to be something/someone you are not is in fact pretty hard to do. In the end it is always you. So everything your avi says or does, it’s you. So back to this dom/sub thing, I really really wonder and I can’t seem to figure it out. And then, who does he play his fantasies with? With female avi’s, yes. But then, think again…some of those will be men too. And maybe he plays with male avi’s as well. And on top of all those questions I now experienced some interesting other aspect of this whole thing. Something, I guess, that only comes into play when you start liking someone. I started to feel about this woman as the ‘other woman’. Competition. How weird is that? Since it is in fact just another side of the man I liked. But the fact that he chooses to be her somehow changed into ‘chooses to be with her’. And even though he speaks about her somewhat indifferently I have the impression she is much more important to him than his male avi. So, that’s it. Defeated by a by male brain and hand created pixelwoman. Weird shit. Above pic? Better to light another smoke on this one.

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